Sockpuppet: Songs

I am not in love
It is not what I am thinking of
But my life is needing something more
Somebody that I can care for

The morning is alright
But by the time it becomes night
I don't know what to do
My empty nest is making me feel blue

Hey, sister, I got what you need
It's a robot baby that you don't need to feed
You just plug it in every night
And it also doubles as a convenient light

It slices, it dices, it makes julienne fries
And inside the box is another surprise
It's a diet pill that'll make your hair long
(but the side-effect is that you break into song)

Doot doot doot ^_^

I waited a four to six week
And just when I thought it was getting bleak
A package it came for me
I plug it in but then what I see

When I try to sleep it glows
This is something that must to lay low
I am getting annoyed
At this silly malfunctioning android

That's not covered by the warranty
But we'll sell you one for an additional fee
The product went through a focus group
And what everyone wanted was a big feature soup

You can't expect everything to work right
Our scientists made it overnight
Just be glad you got it in just one piece
Try our other product, a robotic neice

This is such crap, I am sending it back
Everything you make is so totally wack
And the diet pill had the opposite effect
I now weigh fifty pounds, but my song is in check

I do not think you went to the FDA
I will sue you all and make you all pay
To get your address I call the support line
In Indonesia, on my very own dime

The number you have reached
Is not in service
Please check the number
And dial again

Oh, fuck.